im sick of having bipolar, depression, anxiety and paranoia! im sick of mental illness controlling my life. my medication has its own mood swings and chooses not to work the same everyday. im sick of cracking it at my boyfriend over the smallest things. im sick of him being scared of speaking to me about certain things cos he doesnt know how ill react. im sick of feeling like theres a demon inside of me that i cant control. im sick of always being angry or sad longer than happy. this is the type of shit that makes me have my doubts on god because if he existed why would he put people through this?! i dont know what i did to deserve this!! why me, why should i have to deal with something thats un-curable for the rest of my life? medication just hides it and puts a shell over it, so unless i pop pills everyday for the rest of my life ill be a maniac, and my medication just makes me numb when its working properly, it takes SO much for me to cry or be angry, like thats good but i want normal emotions just like a normal person!! :(